Oh hey Lily! Welcome back, how was that librarian conference you went to? Did anything interesting happen while you were gone? Nah, not really. Pam just lead a rebellion and we all pretty much shit our pants, the usual. Hey why's your eye twitching?
Just goes to show, you don't interfere with what goes on behind those locked stalls. Toilet paper is what tames the raging beast sleeping in the bowels of the Saint Augustine's faculty. To remove those restraints will doom us all.